Broken

We’re down another drinking glass.  

The shards 

Stupidly shatter 

Scattering useless pieces of

No-longer-drinking-glass 

On our rug. 

“It’s just a broken glass”

You shrug. 

“We’ll clean it up.” 

But to me 

It’s just another tally mark 

It’s just another ounce 

In the bucket 

On the scale 

Of judgement. 

It’s just another failure. 

Enraged, erratic, irrational, 

This is your fault. 

To you, it's always just a drinking glass.  

To you, we can always just pick up the pieces. 

The glass is broken, it’s never coming back! 

Can’t you see it?  

The scale has been tilted 

And it’s too late to pull myself out of the downward spiral. 

I’m so mad at you- 

No, I’m mad at myself- 

Mad at myself because you are always so much better than me at these things-

Mad at myself because I feel like I need your help to clean up this glass-

“I can clean it up myself!”

After an hour of pointless fighting

We clean up the shards of glass 

And you still love me. 

We’ll buy another drinking glass. 

You hug the broken parts of me 

Because you don’t think they’re useless shards. 

You know me and you think I’m not completely broken,

Would anyone else agree? 

Do I want to know? 

Maybe it doesn’t matter. 

Maybe what matters is fighting over a stupid drinking glass 

Because you know me 

And you see the broken pieces 

And you still love me.

Please, accept me, love me, 

Come back after every fight

To gather the pieces, 

Together 

We can fix it, 

And if we can’t 

We’ll buy another drinking glass.